My Bittersweet Romance
by Angel Phlox
Summary: It's been two years since Natsu's disappearance. Lucy, who was broken hearted after this, turned to Gray for comfort. After a while, they started dating. The truth is, she can't forget about Natsu. So she uses Gray as a "pain killer". She loves him, but she knows that she'll always remember Natsu. If Natsu comes back, what will she do?
1. Heart of Ice

**My Bittersweet Romance**

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**Author's Note: this story is going to be a bit more sexual than my other ones, just a heads up. I decided that it would make the story flow better. I'm not used to writing about that kind of stuff, so pardon any weirdness.**

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**Prologue**

It's been two years since Natsu's disappearance. No one knows if he's dead or alive, but everyone assumes that he's dead. Fairy Tail has never been the same since then. Lucy, who was broken hearted after this, turned to Gray for comfort. After a while, they started dating. Everyone was shocked by this, but no one said anything about it.

It's obvious that Lucy misses Natsu, but she insists that she's happy. The truth is, she can't forget about Natsu. So she uses Gray as a "pain killer". She loves him, but she knows that she'll always remember Natsu.

But if Natsu comes back, what will she do?

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**Chapter One: Heart of Ice**

**[Lucy]**

Gray leans down for a kiss. I let him do what he wants. We kiss for a while then rest on my bed. He holds me in his arms and I look at him. He smiles and kisses me once more. I give in and let myself go numb. _So what? It doesn't matter anyways._

I make love with him so I don't have to feel the pain of losing Natsu. But I do love him. I love Gray very much. But there's always Natsu in the back of my mind. Natsu is my wound and Gray is my pain killer. His touch calms me and his kiss makes everything go away.

But it's not quite right. The way Natsu held me was different. The way he kissed me was different. But I got used to Gray and his touch. At first it was uncomfortable and emotionally painful. But then I became numb and got accustomed to the ice mage that lays next to me.

People have said that my heart is now made of ice. I'll neither confirm nor deny it. Why? Because I don't know myself. I don't know what I feel anymore, except that I love Gray and he kills the pain. Although, I _have_ become a bit more mean since Natsu disappeared. I'm still friends with Levy-chan, but lately I've found her almost annoying. She won't stop going on about how much she and Gajeel are in love. It almost makes me sick. But I'm happy for her nonetheless.

"You're quiet today." Gray says.

I look at him and kiss his lips. "Is that a problem?"

He shakes his head and kisses me back. "Not at all."

**-The Next Day-**

I wake up to the familiar chill of Gray's body. His coldness used to make me sneeze in the morning, but I've gotten used to it. I kiss his forehead then carefully slip out of his arms. I go to the bathroom and wash my face, brush my teeth, and comb my hair. He probably won't wake up for another ten or twenty minutes.

As I get ready for the day, I think back to when Gray and I first kissed on my couch. We didn't have sex or anything, we just kissed. It was the first time that I hadn't felt the pain in my chest. The first time I finally felt better. I was free, if only for a few minutes. I could finally find peace in the arms of an ice mage that I had come to love. The ice mage that I still love, and always will love.

_But what if Natsu comes back?_ I brush that annoying thought aside and change into some black pants with a dark blue tank top and a black jacket. It's winter here in Magnolia, Gray's favorite time of year, obviously. I've started dressing in darker colors since bright one remind me of _him_. Plus Gray says I look good in blue.

As I walk out of the bathroom, I see Gray stretching. _He probably just woke up._ I walk over and sit next to him.

"Ohayo, sleepyhead." I say.

He looks at me and kisses my forehead. "Ohayo."

I force a smile. "So, are we gonna go on a job today?"

He shrugs. "If you're feeling up to it."

I nod. "I'm up to it."

He grins and says, "Just gimme a few minutes to shower and get ready then."

I nod and kiss him once more. "I'll be in the living room if you need me."

"Hai." He says as he finds some clothes and walks into the bathroom.

My smile fades as I walk into the living room. I pick up a book and begin reading.

_It's always gonna be like this, isn't it?_


	2. Memories

**Chapter 2: Memories**

**[Lucy]**

As Gray and I walk to the guild, his fingers intertwine with mine. He looks at me and smiles a little. It's his way of saying "Just get through the day." I kiss his cheek and continue walking.

It's not too cold today, though I've gotten used to being cold. I love playing in the snow and watching Gray use his magic. The first time I saw him use it, I was amazed and instantly fell in love with it. Ice magic was always one of my favorites, though I never learned how to use it. I don't think I could have gone through the training that Gray described.

As I look around, I can't help but remember the last time I was holding hands with _him_ on a winter morning. He would always warm me right up with his touch. His smile was enough to get me through the toughest days.

But Gray's touch is different. His touch numbs my pain and his smile reassures me that love is real and still exists. Now that I walk with Gray instead of _him_, I can be sure that I'll get through this. Gray is more than a mere crutch or pain killer. He's my other half. The love of my life. And Natsu? He's a precious friend that I'll never forget.

Unfortunately, these memories of him still linger. And I don't think they'll ever go away. They might fade with time, but they'll never go away. And you know what? That's ok with me. I don't ever want to forget. No matter how painful. Because pain means that I'm still alive and that I've made memories. And that's what _really_ counts.

"What kind of a job do you wanna go on?" Gray asks, which snaps me out of my daze.

I shrug. "I don't really care, as long as it isn't stupid or degrading."

He laughs. "Then that means you can't complain if you don't like it."

I smile and punch him in the arm. "Yeah yeah, whatever."

When we arrive at the guild, the whispers start. I can't tell what people are saying, but I'm pretty sure it isn't very good. Then again, I don't really care. What Gray and I do is _our _business, not everyone else's.

"Ohayo, Lucy!" Mira-san says cheerfully.

_How is she always so happy?_ I force a smile. "Ohayo, Mira-san."

"Are you and Gray gonna go on a job today?" she asks.

I nod as Gray walks over to the request board. "Hai."

Mira-san smiles. "Let me know when you find something, ok?"

I nod. "Ok."

I walk over to Gray and stand next to him. "See anything that's interesting?"

He shakes his head. "Nothing so far."

"What about this one?" I point to a request.

He takes the piece of paper then frowns. "Are you sure, Luce?"

My heart beats faster when he calls me "Luce." Natsu used to call me that. And _only_ Natsu called me that. I still haven't gotten used to it when Gray calls me that. I guess I should be, but all it takes is time.


	3. Whispers on the Streets

**Chapter 3: Whispers on the Street**

**[Gray]**

I examine the job request that Lucy picked. It has a big reward, but what we're required to do is kind of dangerous. I've noticed that Lucy's been on the daring side lately; taking more dangerous jobs and stuff like that. I'm not too worried, since I almost always go with her, but it still bothers me. I look at her one last time and she gives me a look that says, "Argue with me and you're sleeping on the couch tonight."

I sigh and go tell Mira what job we're going on. She looks at me with shock and confusion.

"Are you _sure_, Gray?" she asks.

I shrug. "Hey, don't take it up with me. Take it up with Lucy. It was _her_ idea."

Mira bites her lip and nods. "Ok then. If you think you can handle it…"

I nod. "Trust me, we can handle it."

With that, Lucy and I leave the guild to go board a train. As we walk, I notice that a lot of people are whispering whenever Lucy and I walk by. I can never hear exactly what they're saying, but I can tell from their faces that it isn't good. It's been quiet in Magnolia lately. _Too_ quiet. I'm not the paranoid type, but I'm starting to get a bad feeling.

Lucy slips her hand into mine. "What's the matter Gray? You seem nervous."

I look at her shrug, trying to seem relaxed. "I'm fine. Just thinking."

She frowns for a second but doesn't say anything.

I squeeze her hand. "Is something bothering you?"

She looks from right to left then leans in close. "People are whispering more lately."

I nod. "I've noticed that too."

"Did Fairy Tail do something?"

"I doubt it."

She shrugs and we keep walking. _Something doesn't feel right. And I'm gonna find out what it is_.

**-On The Train-**

Lucy sleeps on my lap as we ride to our destination. When we entered the train, people started whispering. I don't like it. I lean back in my chair and listen to some people talking.

"Have you heard about the shape-shifter that's been causing trouble lately?"

"Yeah. I've heard that it can read minds then turn into someone you love and kill you."

"It's been using the identity of one of the Fairy Tail mages lately."

"What's so great about that?"

"It was pretending to be Natsu Dragneel."

The moment I hear that name, my eye open and I sit up. My whole body goes rigid. _Is that why people have been whispering lately? Because of this shape-shifter?_

"Natsu Dragneel?! _The_ Natsu Dragneel?"

"Yup."

"Isn't he supposed to be dead or something?"

"That's what they say, but who knows."

A shape-shifter disguised as that fire-breathing bastard? Now _that's_ something I gotta see. I pull out the flier again. It says that we need to apprehend a murderer who's face always is never the same twice…_So that's what we're going after?_ I look down at Lucy. If that guy decides to turn into Natsu, she won't be able to fight. _I really hope that those guys are wrong…_


	4. Rumors

**Chapter 4: Rumors**

**[Gray]**

Lucy stirs and I look at her. She opens her eyes and stares at me. Her gaze paralyzes me and I have to shake my head to get my mind to focus. _How can I tell her something like this? It would kill her._

"Gray?" she says.

"Nani?"

"You're not telling me something. You don't look like yourself."

_How does she do that? It freaks me out!_ "There's something I need to tell you."

She sits up and frowns. "What is it?"

I take a deep breath. "I've heard some rumors about this murderer we're going after."

She nods. "And?"

"They say that he can, _maybe_, read minds and…" I pause. "Kill you with the face of someone you love."

She bites her lip and clenches her fists.

"There's one more thing…"

She lowers her head and speaks in s whisper. "What is it?"

"They say that he's been using Natsu's face…"

I gently put my arms around her. She clutches my shirt and buries her head in my chest. I rub her back and hold her close. I'm not sure what I should do. I mean, what I told her could probably prevent her from keeping her head and finishing this job. _Maybe we should just go back to Magnolia. If Lucy can't do this, I don't wanna force her._

"I have to face him, Gray." Lucy says.

"What?"

"If he is using Natsu's face, I have to be able to look him in the eye and not falter. I need to get over this." She looks up at me with tear-filled eyes.

I sigh and admire what she just said. I nod and kiss her. "I'll be right by your side the whole time."

She smiles and kisses me back. "Arigato. I couldn't ask for anything more."

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**Author's note: I know it's kinda short, but I wasn't originally planning on doing this. So I'm playing it by ear. **


	5. Battlefield of the Heart

**WARNING: semi-extreme sexual content**

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**Chapter 5: Battlefield of the Heart**

**[Lucy]**

I wake up to find myself in an unfamiliar hotel room. I look around and see Gray lounging on the couch. _How did we get here? How long was I asleep? _When_ did I fall asleep?_ I rub my eyes and it all comes back to me. I clench my fists as I remember who's face I'm going to have to destroy.

"You're awake." Gray says matter-of-factly as he sits next to me.

I take his hand in mine. "I don't know if I'll be of much use…"

"That's why I suggested we go back." he says wearily. "But you insisted that we continue."

"Why don't I remember?"

He looks away. "Let's just say I learned of a new spell a while back."

_He used magic on me? Now that's just wrong!_

"Don't look so angry, Luce. I did it for your own good." he says.

He called me Luce again. Doesn't he know that it reminds me of _him_? Or maybe he does it on purpose…Either way, I'm not used to being called Luce by someone other than _him_.

A hand appears in front of my face. "You ok?"

I nod. "Y-yeah. Just…thinking."

Gray smiles a little and kisses me. "Hope you're thinking about strategies."

I shake my head. "Sorry, no. And I'm not in the mood to joke."

He shrugs. "Then what _are_ you in the mood for?"

"That's a dangerous question."

"I'm a pretty dangerous guy."

I grin slyly as I tackle him and kiss him passionately.

His shirt comes off and I place my hands on his chest. His hands are around my waist and slowly move back and forth. The overwhelming sensation of pleasure takes over and I let him take off my shirt. He rubs my breasts so that surges of pleasure course through me. He kisses my neck and my hands explore his back. The sensations overwhelm me and before I know it, we're no longer wearing pants. His hands slide up and down my back and waist. I kiss him without pausing for breath. A small squeeze of my breasts causes a throbbing sensation of pleasure and arousal. He groans with pleasure and continues. _So this is Gray…_

**-Two Hours Later-**

After we shower and get dressed, I start to come up with ways to make sure I don't lose focus on the battlefield. _If this guy can read minds, then he'll know that Natsu is a point of weakness for me. I have to move past Natsu. I can't let him become my weak point._ I have to accept the fact that he's dead, even though it hasn't, technically, been proven. I must accept that he's gone forever.

What I _really_ need to focus on was what Gray and I just did. It was so freeing and mindless. I've gathered my thoughts and emotions and am more settled down. _Natsu is my wound, and Gray is the medicine._ I can't help but smile.

As much as I love Gray, I cannot ever forget Natsu. It's not that I haven't moved on, I just haven't _forgotten_. I'm waiting for a man that will never come home, and I'm in love with a man that I compare to another. _My own hearts doesn't even know what it wants. It's like a battlefield._


	6. Facing My Weakness

**Chapter 6: Facing My Weakness**

**[Lucy]**

Gray and I slip in and out of the shadows of Maple (the city we're in). The night is cool and I can clearly see the stars. Everywhere we go, we always manage to find maple trees. _Well no shit, since the town is called Maple…_I mentally facepalm myself for being so stupid. I've been distracted all night and for the past few nights as well. Gray has noticed but hasn't really said much about it.

We make our way into the woods. There are so many different kinds of maples that I can't help but admire them. I even see some that glow and turn different colors. They all have different scents to them. I stop and just take in the trees: their color, scent, and feel.

"Lucy!" Gray hisses. "The hell are you _doing_? We're chasing after a _serial killer_ and you're standing here gawking at trees?!"

I frown as I look at him. "Can't I admire the scenery?"

He sighs. "Maybe if we weren't in the middle of a _job_!"

"I'm sorry, ok? I just—"

"Well, well, well. What do we have here?" a voice from the shadows asks.

Gray and I turn to see Natsu, or rather, someone with Natsu's face, walk out of the shadows. They're wearing all black and a scarf. _Now _that's_ just wrong_. My heart beats faster and I can feel sweat run down my face. I know that this isn't the _real_ Natsu, but I can't help it. The face is real enough, and I'm rendered helpless.

Gray grabs my shoulders and shakes me a little. "Lucy, snap out of it!"

I shake my head. "I-I'm fine…"

The Natsu Imposter laughs. "Can't look me in the eye, _Luce_?"

My heart stops for a brief second and I fall to my knees. _Sure _sounds_ like Natsu. Maybe the police were mistaken?_ My whole body is shaking and I wrap my arms around myself.

"Aw, poor thing." the Imposter says. "She looks so fragile."

Gray stands in front of me. "Cut the bullshit, you phony-ass douchebag! Show us your _real_ face!"

"And _why_ would I do that? So you can win? No, I don't think so." they grin evilly.

_How dare they use Natsu's face like that! I'll kick their ass myself!_ I slowly stand and pull out a key, ready to fight this bastard. I don't care _what_ they say! The _real _Natsu is long dead! They know that, and so do I! now it's all a matter of who's stronger!

Gray stands next to me and puts a fist on top of a flat palm. "Ready, Lucy?"

I nod. "Let's kick some ass!"

He laughs. "With pleasure!"

The Imposter grins. "I like it when they fight back. Bring it, Fairy Tail mages!"

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**Author's Note: Sorry for the late update and shortness! I'll write another chapter asap! Thank you for your patience!**


	7. Fighting a Comrade

**Chapter 7: Fighting Against a Comrade**

**[Gray]**

"Open! Gate of the bull, I call upon thee! Taurus!" Lucy shouts.

In a flash of gold light, a giant bull with an axe appears.

"Moooo!" he yells then poses. _Are all her spirits this dramatic?_

I put my hands into position. "Ice Make: Lance!"

Giant spears of ice shoot towards the Imposter. They dodge and try to roundhouse kick me. I sidestep and punch them in the stomach. As soon as my hand makes contact, they disappear. I look at Lucy and she nods.

"Taurus! Attack the guy who looks like Natsu!"

"Your wish is my command!" then he looks at her. "Lucy-san, you still have a nice body!"

She frowns and punches him. "Just do your job!"

Angry Lucy makes me want to laugh and tease her, but now isn't the time for that. I turn and am back to back with Lucy. Taurus is next to her as I tense up, waiting for something to happen. _Can they teleport? If so, we're in huge trouble._

"Ha!" comes a laugh. "Is that all you got? I thought Fairy Tail was better than this!"

That makes my blood boil. "We haven't even _tried_ yet, you piece of scum!"

I form a bow and arrow. I wait until I hear the snapping of a twig (totally cliché, I know). I turn and shoot the arrow. After that, I shoot another arrow. I hear a grunt and something slams onto the ground. I run into that direction as Taurus and Lucy follow.

"Open! Gate of the Scorpion, I call upon thee! Scorpio!" Lucy says with power.

A cloud of sand forms and with the flash of a gold light, Scorpio is ready for action.

"We are!" he cries, ready to fight at Lucy's word.

"Throw all you've got there! At the guy who looks like Natsu." She says.

I briefly look at her and see that she's crying. I turn away so I'm not tempted to go over to her. I find the Imposter and grab his (still don't know if it's _really _a guy or not) shirt and throw him against a tree.

"Ice Make: Hammer!" I say as I pound him to a pulp multiple times.

"Gray, get outta the way!" Lucy shouts.

I barely have enough time to drop the guy when a blast of sand hits him head-on. I hear a groan and some blood is on the ground. Taurus delivers the finishing blow then disappears in a shower of gold sparkles. _Sparkles? Seriously? That is _so_ not manly!_

The Imposter falls to the ground and I walk over to him. His face is no longer Natsu's, but at the same time, it's no one's. His face is like a giant shadow. I frown, trying to think of which magic type this would be.

"That was too easy…" I say quietly.

Lucy stands next to me and slips her hand into mine. "It's over, right?"

I squeeze her hand and sigh. "For now…"

I handcuff the guy and I take him to the police. Lucy stays behind and stares at the tree where he was attacked. She's shaking, but I don't know if she's still crying. _We got the guy, so why is she so upset? Is there something we're missing?_

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**Author's Note: So, who do ****_you_**** think the Imposter is? Is he (or she) ****_really_**** a shape-shifter, or could they actually be Natsu? Stay tuned to find out!**


	8. Uneasiness

**Chapter 8: Uneasiness**

**[Lucy]**

It's been two weeks and we still haven't left Maple. Why? Because the stupid Imposter got away. Gray and I found out last week, so now we've been "posted" here until further notice. I don't like it and I want to go home, but there's nothing I can do about it. Gray says that I shouldn't be so worried, but I have a bad feeling and it just won't go away.

"Luce."

I turn and see Gray staring at me. "What?"

He sighs. "You were spacing out again."

I look at the floor. "Yeah, I know…"

He stands and sits next to me on the couch. He slips his arm around my waist and I end up laying my head on his shoulder. I take in his scent and feel much more relaxed. I look up at him and kiss his cheek. In return, he kisses my forehead.

"Feel better?" he asks quietly.

I nod. "Yeah. Thanks to you."

"But I didn't do anything."

I shrug and sit up. "I think you did."

I lean in and kiss his lips. He kisses back, and I let his tongue explore my mouth, as I've done before. I slide my tongue over into his mouth and explore. We kiss over and over, each time becoming more passionate. His hands slide up and down my back, while mine are on his chest. Soon his hands are under my shirt and find my breasts. He rubs them in such a way that a wave of arousal and pleasure course through me. I gently bite his bottom lip, indicating that I want more. He takes the opportunity and squeezes my breasts. I gasp with pleasure and kiss him harder. My hands are under his shirt and are going everywhere. His body may be cold, but his skin is smooth and touchable.

After a few minutes, we stop and stare at each other. His dark blue eyes show hunger, of course, but also some fatigue. I take his hands in mine and stand. He stands too, frowning from confusion. I walk over to the bedroom and sit on the bed. He gives me a tired smile and sits with me, keeping his clothes on (what a surprise). I lay on my back.

"You look tired." I tell him.

He lays next to me. "So what if I am?"

"Making out is more fun when you're _not_ tired." I tell him while poking his nose.

He raises an eyebrow and grins. "So it wasn't fun?"

I give him a sly smile. "I didn't say that."

"Then what _are_ you saying?"

I shrug. "You just seem tired, that's all. We've been trying to track this guy down for weeks now. Just get some rest."

Gray sits up. "You know I can't do that, Luce. I _have_ to find this guy, before something else happens."

I frown and also sit up. "Like what? He's already killed two more people! We've been here for _two_ _weeks_ and still couldn't protect those people!"

Tears gather in my eyes, not that I want them to. But the deaths of those people are on our heads now. It's made me uneasy and I haven't been able to sleep very well, and neither has he. Gray knows this, he just won't admit it. We're _both_ tired and want to go home, but we can't. I know that Gray hates staying here as much as I do, and all we ever do is roam the streets and read documents about this guy. Frankly, it's getting old.

I sigh in frustration and cover my face. Gray hugs me and I cry into his shoulder. I'm just so frustrated with myself, this mission, this place—everything. I want to give up and go home, but I know that Fairy Tail mages don't quit. I refuse to sully the name of the best guild in Fiore.

"What's wrong?" Gray asks, sounding more tired than ever.

"I'm just so damn frustrated! This stupid mission is driving me nuts!" I say as I grip his shirt.

He sighs and rubs my back. "Look, Luce, _you're_ tired and _I'm_ tired. Why don't we get some sleep?"

I let go of him. "I can't sleep. I've already _tried_."

He gives me a look that says I'm-way-too-tired-to-deal-with-this-right-now. "_Please,_ Lucy. Do it for me."

I bite my lip then nod. "Fine."

Gray smiles tiredly once more and turns off the lights. We both crawl under the covers and I snuggle up against him. He turns over and kisses my forehead then closes his eyes. I know I should do the same, but I still feel extremely uneasy. I close my eyes and I see the dead bodies of the people _he_ killed. I keep seeing his—Natsu's—face and the way he grinned. I can still hear the way he called me Luce.

After what seems like hours of tossing and turning, I sit up and wipe the sweat off my forehead. I carefully get out of bed and go into the kitchen. I put on some water for tea, hoping that it'll calm me down. _Why won't this uneasiness go away?_

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**Author's Note: Sorry that I took so long to update! ^_^'**


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